The Perfect Christmas Present- The Encyclopedia of Unusual Sex Practices

My Favorite EncyclopediaThe Encyclopedia of Unusual Sex Practices is one of the best Christmas gifts a girl could ever receive. I got it from a friend on the lam from the law (or on vaction from a teaching stint in South Korea-it was never quite clear). The book was published in 1992 and I am not sure it is up to date with all of the delicious new words in the Urban Dictionary, but that doesn't matter, it still kicks ass.  

A few gems for the curious?

Sororate: the right of a husband to take sexual favors (usually in the form of marital rights) from all of his wife's sisters. Talk about encouraging sibling rivalry. Somehow, I doubt Sororate would fare too well in modern-day times, but as always, I definitely reserve the right to be wrong.

Auto-fellatio: This is pretty self-explanatory and the illustration in the book is top-notch. According to Kinsey, who is rather reputable in the whole sex study industry, approximately 2-3 males in a thousand are able to give themselves blow-jobs. This statistic, obviously, lends itself to the old joke about why a dog licks his balls (because he can) and the statistic is also sure to encourage the other 997-998 men to try again.

Bee-Stings: Betcha had no idea that they had a sexual connotation. I didn't either, which is why "The Encyclopedia of Unusual Sex Practices" is such a great gift idea. Bee-Stings, in case you are wondering, are used to extend the duration of an orgasm. I'm sorry to report that I have not taken the time to confirm this statistic with any outside sources, so be careful before you decide to put your dong into any bee hives, not that you need such advice, but in the age of lawsuits, it's best to be clear.

Merkin-On first inspection, this seems a little strange to me. It is an "artificial vagina" or a "wig for the pubic area". Obviously, this is prior to the days of Brazilian bikini waxes. Currently, the "Merkins" come in many forms, most of which are less than palatable to the female eye.

Timophilia- This is not, as it may first appear, used to refer to those who are sexually aroused by changes in time. Instead, it refers to what I would term as those looking for wealth or status in their mates- what we now "lovingly" refer to as Sugar Babies.

Toilet Training- I mistakenly thought this was only for toddlers, but apparently this is also for adults who prefer to train their partners in the bathroom. Frankly, I couldn't even read the whole section on this as this is definitely not my cup of tea. If this is what you are into, that's ok, but I am probably not your GGG for this one.